October 27th, 2011
Halloweek, Day Four: My Nightmares

  • Have you ever wondered why zombies and vampires are so popular now? Why they’re being shoved from every orifice of pop culture and into our lives? Consider this: in a few days, the planet’s population will reach seven billion. And they will all want to eat, in a world with rapidly dwindling resources. Maybe the reason we’re being inundated with images of creatures that feed on human flesh and blood — who actually make it seem attractive — is because we’re headed in that direction ourselves. Maybe all our zombie and vampire stories are just preparing us mentally for the concept of  humans as food.
  • “And Rick Perry has just been inaugurated as the 45th President of the United States of America.”
  • This.
  • “Dad, this is my boyfriend, Joe Francis.”
  • Community” Canceled by NBC; Will Be Replaced by “Whitney” Reruns
  • Killer robots filled with more killer robots. What could possibly go wrong?
  • Plagues for The New Millennium. Now with Sex-Organ Burrowing Beetles. And Kardashians. Or is that redundant?
  • “In other news, Ben & Jerry’s has announced it will replace all ingredients in its ice cream with vegan alternatives.”